I had met Sylvia in Retro, a big noisy club with electro music home of many
of Prague’s chemical scene.
Me and speedo were going with two girls and a boy. I was making out with the
cuter of the two, but we soon detached as they were getting wasted, kissing
each other and didn’t seem to lead anywhere.
There were several hot and sexy girls that night.
MEET SILVIA
But Silvia stood apart.
She was my beauty archetype: small, blonde, slim, beautiful and... Very well
dressed, sexy but not whorish (as several were that night).
She was talking to a guy in stall, and seemed very involved in the
conversation.
Once Speedo left, I stayed.
I saw Sylvia again talking to a different guy close to the bar. I had already
taken my jacket, but at this point I knew I had to talk to her and do my best
to get her.
I said to myself "I'll stay here 5 minutes, if she doesn't go to the
toilet, I'll go there and tell the guy I need to talk to her, and grab her
apart".
But she went before the 5 minutes expired. I grabbed her arm and in spite of
an atypical initial resistance saying she doesn't usually "do this" I
got her phone number.
We met some days later, but I botched the meet up.
LEADING TO THE MEETUP
My 1st text was
“Ciao Silvia, it was nice meeting you.
Congratulations, lemme know your schedule and you will have the chance to see
me again. Lucio, the cool guy from Retro”.
She couldn’t make it on the day we proposed and I wrote her “next time bring a bottle of wine to be
forgiven” and after a few texts that I handled masterfully, she proposed
the new meetup without me asking for it.
DATE
More than one month ago, I botched the date badly. In order of importance:
1. Had crappy logistics
I chose a date and
time that made it impossible not only to get together on that same day, but
also to spend a good amount of time together.
We met at 7:30 when she
was leaving with her parents and had to wake up at 4 that same night (:S).
Dumb idiot, first of all, I should have chosen a day when she didn’t have to
work the day after, and thus could have stayed overnight, or at least till
late.
And second, if that wasn’t possible I should have proposed to meet muuuch earlier.
With my mania of “going out late” and considering 7:30 on a Sunday almost
unacceptably early I was not giving myself the time to get to know her well
enough and make her feel comfortable around me.
Third, I chose a bad place for that time and day and we were sitting in an
empty bar in plain sight of the waiter.
2. I didn’t build anything of a connection
In the little time we had I let myself being thrown
off by the fact that she wasn’t well learned, not too smart and we had *nothing*
in common and were completely different personalities.
2.1 I told her that “most Czech girls actually believed me when I said I was a
ghostbusters (something I had started saying as a joke to avoid the boring “IT
company” but that I kept reusing after a girls’ eye sparkled at that answer, I didn’t
care whether or not they believed me, I just wanted to stay mysterious) and
because of her level of English she actually… understood I *was* a ghostbuster…
and that bothered me as I hoped she was going to be smarter
2.2 Like many Czechs, she was racist. I am too, in a way, but not like this: “I
don’t like Russians, and they’re everywhere”, “I don’t like Slovaks, they’re ..
more bitches (Ed: they were the same Country when she was born)”.
2.3 she had no aspiration, no dreams, no willingness to travel and see new
places… I’m a dreamer
2.4 etc. etc. etc.
3. I didn’t escalate physically
In the face of the challenges I let myself go
into a “failure mentality” and didn’t steam on in spite of everything.
It would have been difficult
to escalate in an empty bar, not drinking much and standing in a place where
the waiter was often able to see us. But it wasn’t impossible.
And while waiting for the tram, rather than springing at her like an animal who’s
been too long in a cage and going for a strong and passionate make out, I just
told her “give me a kiss” before she left. She complied, but how damn weak. Well,
still better than “asking” but still waaaay to weak.
THE AFTER DATE
OK, it wasn’t monstrously bad, but very low compared to what I could
have pulled off. And to make a long story short, after that date it was now me
chasing.
something made pretty obvious by the first message exchange:
“so Wednesday.. “
:) why Wednesday? :)
“sounds like a good day to meet :)
“do you think so? J
ok, will see
The “will see” meant to me she was now in the power seat.
Or at least that she was on the pedestal and me was chasing. That is even worse,
A couple of weeks ago I sent a message saying:
“how’s the new flat Silvia, I hope no
ghosts.
I thnk if we don’t meet soon we never will and it’d be a pity. So lemme know
your schedule and let’s do it” J (I love using double-entendres sometimes J
)
She: “sure. My schedule is very busy now,
but id like to see you again so I’ll thinkg about it nad let you know soon”.
One reason or another, 2 weeks after this, we haven’t met yet.
I have badly missed my window of opportunity.
Chances are getting dimmer after this much time has passed and I failed to
leave a strong impression.
I'm investing waaaay too much emotionally in this, but somehow I don't want to give it up.
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